The new plan

Papa's surgery went well and although he has been too doped up to talk to us, Mama reports that he is good. Thank you all for your great healing energy...keep it coming.

The new plan is that the sperm will arrive on Tuesday, which works well as Taylor is working from home that day. I should ovulate as early as Wednesday and as late as Saturday...we are hoping for early so that Taylor can buy plane tickets to go to Boise to visit and help out with Papa's recovery. If my body doesn't cooperate then she may have to wait until the following weekend.

I have been pretty stressed about this next attempt since I felt a little like a failure with the first insemination...this has nothing to do with the process or our doctor but with my relationship with my body. Aside from my history of disordered eating which I am sure plays into all of this in some way, I have always had this huge fear that I can not get pregnant. I think I don't trust myself or my body so when it was a little more challenging than expected I automatically go to this place where I start thinking the worst. It probably does not help that I work at a fertility clinic and so infertility is the norm for me...I forget that my only real fertility challenge is a lack of sperm and apparently a slightly difficult cervix.

For some reason today I am feeling much more positive about the upcoming attempt. I think we will be more relaxed because we know what is going to happen, we will probably have to use the tenaculum again although our doctor is thinking we might try a different one and she feels really confident so I think that is helping me too. I also might try to take a day off to rest following the insemination's. I have scheduled acupuncture for next Tuesday (Day 14) and for the following Tuesday after the insemination.

Taylor is excited too but as usual is cautiously optimistic and hoping for the best. We are just ready for it to be next week!